Barriers of my own making

Way back when I was making the plan for this novel revision, I had a lot of ideas. I was going to tweak this and change that. I was going to add scenes and delete others. It was a grand plan, and I couldn’t wait to dive into it. There were some speed wobbles initially, where I went a little overboard with changes – thankfully my beta readers reined me in a little. I jumped into the rest of the revisions with great gusto, and for the most part, things went smoothly. Life got in the way a few times, but the bulk of the work, 95% of it, was done in great time.

And then there was that scene.

It wasn’t a difficult scene, or at least, it shouldn’t have been a difficult scene. It was straight forward. I knew what I wanted to happen. I had reasons for wanting to add it into the novel, but then every time I sat down and tried to write, I just couldn’t make it happen. I tried. I tried really, really hard.

Assignments became due, life got complicated, there wasn’t a lot of sleep, and there were a million other things I blamed it on. And then it finally hit me that maybe it wasn’t ‘life’ getting in the way, maybe it was ME. I went back to my beta readers and asked if they thought I needed the scene, and the answer was no, they didn’t think so. I’d invented this scene, decided it desperately needed to be added, and then proceeded to bash my head against the barrier I’d thrown in my path.

Gosh writers can be so silly can’t they?? lol

Today I finished the revision. I ditched the scene and it took just a couple hours of dedicated time to get to the end of the novel. I’m in HEAVEN right now, it feels so incredibly satisfying to make it to the end again. I’ve been reminded just how much I love to write, and that the act of writing makes me happier, helps me be a better mother, a better person.

I’ve got to try not to forget that again. Try not to throw any more barriers in my way. I was so convinced that the scene needed adding that I forgot to check in with myself and the story.

Lesson learned. It’s all very well to have a plan, it’s great to push your story around, poke it with a stick, add and subtract, but if you hit a roadblock check in – does this add something vital to the story? What elements does it enhance? If you can’t find a satisfactory answer then it’s time to rethink.

Onwards!!! I can’t wait to get some more feedback and see what else needs changing in the novel, and I’m very much looking forward to the point at which I can share it with the world.

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3 thoughts on “Barriers of my own making

  1. I’m so pleased you got to the end! I couldn’t agree more about silly writers. We’re an eccentric lot… and constantly throwing ourselves different obstacles to deal with. I’m just pleased you managed to push past yours. X

  2. This sort of thing seems to happen to many writers, and yes, we are silly and eccentric. But you know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way.
    Great job on the draft!

  3. Pingback: Mental Health and Procrastination | Catherine Mede Writes

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