I’ve been struggling to get words down on Sun-Touched – telling myself that I didn’t know what happened in this scene, I wasn’t sure what the point was – that is, until yesterday when M pinned me down and made me spell it out.
I’m at the point of no return. At the end of this scene Madea’s normal life (normal, even with all the obstacles and challenges I’ve laid on her so far) will be shattered. She will be forced to make a decision (bow to her father’s will, or run), that will mean she can never go home, can never return to her job or the world as she knew it.
And it’s a little daunting. I’m kind of scared for her. I’m anxious about what will happen. Excited to be writing it, but anxious for her. I have total faith that she can pull through this mess, but it’s not going to be an easy road. I’m going to make her hurt, a lot, in the process, and the final outcome? Well, I don’t know whether she’s going to be happy in a traditional sense. I can’t say anything for sure because I’m not plotting this baby. I’m right there with her as she tries to navigate her way through it – though I do know more than her, of course.
And as for me? Well, it kind of feels like after I write this scene there is no going back for me either. If I write this scene, when she runs, I’m running too and I can’t stop running until she’s out of the woods and the story is resolved. I have no doubt that I WILL run with her. I want to, so bad. But that hasn’t stopped me vacillating here on the edge where it’s still relatively safe.
It’s time to dive into the middle of this book. Time to pass that point of no return.