challenges, life, new zealand independent book festival

NZ Indie Book Fest: Part One – thank the gods for medication

Well, I am home from a crazy busy weekend and functioning a lot better than I imagined I would be! I learned so much, met so many amazing people – new, and previously known only online – sold some books, hung out with some of my besties, and had a (generally) really good time.

Which isn’t to say that the weekend was without issues. Friday, at any other time, might have reduced me to a quivering mess. I’m more grateful than ever that I asked the Dr to increase my meds because without that I don’t know if I’d have been able to have a good weekend at all.

So, I am going to break down my recap into a couple of different posts! Because I havNZIBFe SO much to say, and I don’t want to leave anything out.

This one will be about Friday – if you follow me on twitter or FB you might know that it was quite the day. It began at 515 am when I woke up (before the kids). I turned on my computer only to face the blue screen of death. I spent the next few hours trying different things, but not completely losing the plot over it, and thankfully my husband was able to fix it for me once he woke up.

I hit the road at 830 and had a really great drive to Auckland, and a lovely catch up with one of my besties before picking up Leigh from the airport. It was after that when things went downhill. My car started steaming and the heat went through the roof. We were on the motorway at peak hour Friday traffic and I was freaking out a bit about not having anywhere to pull off. When we did, we discovered a pool of water under the car, and a bone dry radiator.

An hours wait for AA… who basically could do nothing but call a tow truck… Tee picked up Leigh and our gear and went to the event centre while I waited for the towie, and then in the rain, we drove over the bridge and attempted to find the service centre that the AA insisted was at a specific address but was most definitely not. The towie was very nice, but still, after all the waiting and worry, and twenty minutes of driving around the block in the dark drizzle, I asked him to just drop me and the car at the motel. I was done.

And all the while, I didn’t break down. It had been almost 12 hours since I left home by the time I got to the motel, and I had a little cry then – not knowing what was wrong with the car, or whether it would be able to get me home was worrying. I hadn’t had anything to eat other than some chocolate since lunch time, so I think that’s pretty normal. Leigh and Tee had both commented on just how calm and together I had been throughout the ordeal, and I was! Leigh and I had sat in the car and laughed, and joked, and I had been fine 🙂 I was fine. I AM fine. Leigh kept recalling how last year when my flight was cancelled I’d had a complete meltdown at the airport and all I could feel was gratitude that now I’m more balanced. Now things don’t knock me over the edge. Having that comparison was awesome because it helped to really highlight how different things are now, and I am SO happy about that.

I am grateful for my antidepressants, and the balance they are helping to bring to my life.

Tomorrow, I’ll blog about the good and the bad, and then probably on Thursday I’ll tap into the people, because I met some awesome people, and they were what really made the weekend!


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