I keep looking at my blog, thinking I should post something, but not really knowing where to begin. The right words have been hard to find.

So we’ll start with: I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. As you might remember, I started The Artists Way back near the start of the year. I’m actually sticking with it this time and am up to Week 7. I’m learning a lot about myself, not all of it fun, but valuable even if hard at times. It’s not resulting in massive amounts of writing, though I have been revising steadily over the month (four scenes to go!). I’m changing, I can feel that, though I don’t know what form a lot of changes will take. When I can find the words to get all my thoughts down, I will.

I’ve also accepted that I have a problem, and my moods are not normal. ย I’ve been feeling all kinds of things and about 10 days ago admitted that I’m not okay. I’ve been telling people when they ask, and many are shocked (those in the face to face world, anyway, my online friends don’t get my masks so much!), though at the same time pleased that I am being honest again. It’s one of the steps towards balance for me, so I’m glad I’ve taken it. I’m also taking some vitamins and other things which seem to be helping. I’ve not been back to the pits of despair since then, which is nice. Sometimes, just admitting you aren’t okay takes the pressure off. Masks are heavy, as are fake smiles, so my advice to anyone is to cast those aside.

I also had a short story accepted for publication! Was totally surprised, but delighted of course. I can’t wait til the line-up is announce and the cover revealed, though it’s been lovely seeing other writers I know and respect mentioning on facebook and twitter that they also got in. One writer friend in particular, as it’s her first sale, and she is such an awesome writer. I am so proud of her, and so pleased we’ll get to share space inside the cover of a book.

What else? I guess life is ticking along as normal. We’re still home schooling and there are great days and not so great days. I’m enjoying getting back into some renovation stuff, ticking things off my giant list. Playcentre began last week, so we’re finding a groove with that again as well. It’s a very busy term in general. Oh, and my university paper officially begins on Monday. I’ve not had a chance to read ahead yet, but that’s okay. I feel like I can handle all the things on my plate, which is more than I was feeling a couple weeks ago.

Right, better get back to that revision huh? I hope Feb has been treating you kindly. So hard to believe it’s almost over already.


Nothing quite like it

I’ve been submitting stories to publishers/zines/etc for awhile now, and have become an old hand at it – finding a market no longer takes me days, and putting together the emails takes far less time too. Every market is different, but I know enough about what’s expected that I no longer make rookie mistakes (and it was only ONE time that I forgot to attach the MS ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol).

A lot of my submissions this year have been a case of rinse and repeat – sending out stories that have had previous rejections, trying to find the right home for them.

During October I had the pleasure of sending something new into the world. A virgin MS. Unsullied by rejection, full of hope and wonder. After putting together the email and hitting send I had the most amazing rush. I was filled with a sense of joy and of possibility – the potential that the MS held was limitless. OMG who knew? Maybe they would say yes, and wouldn’t that be exciting? It’s been awhile since I’ve felt that, and I had forgotten just how amazing it is. I think it would probably slot in just under an acceptance as my favourite part of the submission process.

I enjoy sending my stories out, but something new? That’s a ticket to a head rush. There is no negativity attached to the story, no feelings of insecurity and worry, just pure exhilaration at having hit ‘send’.

It makes me want to write more, so that I can send more virgin MS’s into the world. Sure, they won’t all get accepted, but if I don’t keep writing new stories, I can’t capture that feeling again. Now that’s a good incentive!

Back to work I go ๐Ÿ˜‰


…and I do my happy dance, yeah, my happy dance

I woke up today to a lovely email.

An ACCEPTANCE email. Gosh, there have been so many rejections this year, it’s lovely to have something different. Before I opened it I was sure it was going to say ‘thanks, but no thanks’. I started reading and got to the ‘I enjoyed it…’ and finished the sentence with ‘…but it just isn’t a good fit for the zine’. Much to my surprise and joy, it said ‘…we’d like to include…’


I’d just like to mention that this is also the first thing I’ve had ‘accepted’ to a place where I don’t know someone. Which is not to say that I think I’ve had things published just because I’ve known people (I respect them too much to think they’d say yes just because I’m someone they know!), and so it feels slightly different. Not more exciting, but maybe a little cooler because there is no question in my mind about whether prior knowledge of me had any influence over the final decision.

Anyway – YAY! More details later after I’ve sent back what I need to and have more information to share ๐Ÿ™‚


Acceptance is golden

So, I heard back yesterday about my short story and YAY it’s been accepted for the horror anthology, which goes to show that working on it a little more and resubmitting it was definitely worthwhile. I am so glad that was the choice I made. I’ll give some more detail when I hear further on it, but it’s due for release in March, so not too long to wait!

It certainly gave me a great boost, and spurred me back into writing – in fact I started two new short stories yesterday, one for a 1000 word challenge, and the other one that has been slow forming for a few days after reading about the latest search term challenge (for anyone curious, my first word is stillborn). I don’t think I’ll be entering it, but it’s certainly given me a good idea that I am looking forward to following through on.

Now that the new routine is in place, and working reasonably well (I say reasonably because today Lauren only slept for 45 minutes and I hadn’t managed to get any writing done by that point – ย heres hoping I can get some time later in the day, am currently blogging from the couch on the deck while she plays with water, but I can barely see the screen cause of the sun!) I’m hoping to get back into the writing full force, focusing primarily on short stories. My plan for the (LOL she’s just climbed all the way into the bucket of water…. sorry, too funny not to mention!), anyways, my plan for the next few months is to write and polish a good swag of stories so that I have plenty to submit during the second half of the year, where I predict there won’t be a lot of writing going on, and even if I write, certainly not a lot of editing or polishing.

I can feel this baby moving all the time now, the scan is coming up quickly (friday morning), and I am getting so emotional about baby stuff. The knowledge that I am actually having a teeny little baby is hitting me hard now and I am so excited. Aww, another wee one. I love my babies, the fact that there will be 3 to love instead of 2 is just such a massive blessing.