monday check in, writing

Monday – and I’m done

Well. Today is fairly monumental.

I am officially finished edits on Sun-Touched, and it is off with my proofreader. I’m not even sure how to feel. It’s been such a long time coming and now I am here. At the place where it’s just the final touches – blurb, acknowledgements, dedication and formatting. Oh, and the cover. Which is proving to be more complicated than we thought it would, naturally 😉

Anyway, I’ve been fairly quiet this past few weeks. Littlest was vomiting the other week, and then school went back and things kicked into gear again. We spent the weekend at a marae, and visiting some of my old haunts which was really nice, if a little sad at times. My primary school, which I adored so much, has been completely demolished. The land is there. The trees remain. But all the buildings have been removed, the tennis courts pulled up, and the pool taken out as well. It was so strange to see it that way. Ah well, I will always have my fond memories, and I got to share my favourite climbing tree with my children, which was very special.

PhotoGrid_1437979590844The time off was lovely, and much needed. I enjoyed hanging out with my homeschooling tribe, enjoyed the communal living, the laughs, the tears, the ease of friends and the comfort of knowing we are part of something bigger than ourselves. Knowing there is a safety net for any one of us when needed is pretty awesome. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

There was a lot of colouring, and eating – we even had an epic hangi, nom nom – gathering around a fire, and a really great planning meeting. I’ve returned feeling more whole, if more aware of how lonely and isolating modern life can be at times. It is strange to only have our family here in the house.

So what now? Well, my plans have changed ever so slightly, and I still have work to do. But I am hopeful to be ordering the proof copy of Burn tomorrow (knock on wood), and then Sun-Touched won’t be too far behind. Exciting times! Print! Omg!

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monday check in

Updates!!

This week has been… well, ‘a game of two halves’ as captains of sports teams so often say. I spent much of it battling against nerves, and the rest catching up and doing some epic edits. Once I realized that the giant wall I seemed to be bashing my head against was really massive anxiety about handing Sun-Touched over to my editor, I could work on breaking the wall down and getting on with things.

You see, she’s REALLY good. And her opinion matters oodles to me. I am probably more nervous about giving her the book than I am publishing the thing. And yet at the same time, I know she enjoys my writing and it’s actually not HER that I am nervous about, it’s me. I have a lot of self doubt when it comes to my writing and so I’ve managed to convince myself that the novel is going to need a boatload more editing and that there is no possible way I have done a good enough job. And maybe I haven’t – that’s actually not the end of the world. I just go in again and do some more work. I am not afraid of hard work.

But I just so want this novel to be done. It’s the FIRST full novel I’ll release. I LOVE this book. I want it to be good. So I’m nervous. And that’s actually okay too. And once I worked through all of that I could get back to those all important edits.

And I am almost on track. I hand it over later this week and I am confident I’ll get it done in time. Woo! And then I’m going to take a weekend off editing and try to write something short and new – fun times.

I’ve had another distraction this week as well… A friend needed to rehome her adorable kitten and I somehow (still not sure how) got Hubby to agree to let us take her in. I’ve loved this kitten since the moment I saw her, and I know she loves me because she always purrs up a storm. So we picked her up on Tuesday and amazingly she’s slotted into the family with very little difficulty. The cats tolerate her, the kids are in heaven, the dog thinks it’s awesome to have a new animal to play with, and I am one very content writer.

kitty

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Why I love Monday

Typically, Monday has been one of my favourite days of the week because it’s the first day we’re ‘back’ into things. School, work, Playcentre. It usually comes after a busy weekend, and is my first chance of the week to actually get some stuff done.

Today, I love Monday because it’s the beginning of a new week. I’ve been feeling really flat, depressed and just plain waaaaahh for days now. It’s not been a typical block, as such, because if I could’ve sat down and made myself get to work, I would have got a lot done – I just couldn’t sit down and face it. The words are all there for both my novel, and my first essay for my counselling paper, but I just couldn’t make myself let them out of my head.

Which sucked. Big time. I got caught in a loop. MUST get this stuff done. CAN’T sit down and do it. Getting further behind. The clock is counting. I sat here at my laptop every day, frozen, and feeling worse and worse about the fact that I wasn’t making any progress.

Well, not today. I did a little writing yesterday, and a few days before that – the words flowed as soon as I let them out which shows that I CAN do this – and I refuse to linger in this hell hole of limbo any longer. I’m the only one who can change the way I feel, and so I’m going to do that. Now.

Monday is a wonderful day. I love that every week I get to start fresh. So here is to letting go of the week that was, and welcoming in the week to come. Here is to making the most of every day and not letting the bad days of the past encroach on what could well be a good one.

Happy Monday! (and to those who haven’t quite reached it yet – I hope it’s a good one 😉 ).