It’s been a long held opinion that a lot of writers have mental problems – ranging from mild cases of depression through to more serious illnesses – something about creativity and craziness walking hand in hand I guess.
That said, most of the writers I know are truly wonderful. I know that some of them have struggled with issues in the past but in general I’d call them all more sane that most, though definitely quirky 😉
Personally, I’ve certainly had issues. I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar type 2 about 6 years ago now I guess, though I got it under control through counseling rather than drugs, and becoming hyper aware of what was going on in my head so that I could try and counter my disorder. These days, I don’t think I could claim to still be bi-polar, though I still have bigger ups and downs than most, and I do a damn good job (if I do say so myself) of controlling my moods and minimising the impact of my problems. In general, I’d say I’m pretty well balanced, and I can usually pull myself back to that centre. I’ve well and truly dealt with the events which triggered my mental illness and I feel really proud of myself for that.
And yet, I can’t sleep lately. I lie awake in bed thinking, and thinking, and thinking, and it hit me this morning that I’m in a bit of a manic state, no doubt induced by the stress of the month. I just can’t seem to switch off for more than an hour at a time. My mind is flitting here and there, though thankfully, I am able to get some things done!
Every now and then, I do let things slip, and my natural instinct to say ‘yes’ to everything and my general enthusiasm for all things writing related can work against me. I’m well aware that I overworked myself during June, and even though I’ve been telling people that I’ll take it easy in July, I wasn’t sure that I really would.
Until today. I have got to get myself back in balance, otherwise I am going to crash and burn and I simply will not allow that to happen.
So, I AM going to take it easy during July. I’m going to take deep breaths and say ‘no’ more than I say ‘yes’, I’m going to do only the things I want to, for my pleasure, not because I feel like I have to.
And if any of you sees me doing otherwise, let me know, because I am sure I’ll need the reminder 😉