Why sometimes it’s better not to want to write

I’m having a very frustrating week. It’s school holidays (enough said, right? You other parents know what I’m talking about), and there is a lot of bickering going on, a lot of issues getting children to sleep and keeping them asleep for as long as they should be because of the house being so noisy and exciting. Sadly, this has been resulting in me getting about zero time to myself.

Seriously, I had to enlist the babysitting skills of my mother this morning just so that I could shower alone for the first time in weeks. It’s pretty dire folks.

Until Monday (I think it was, anyway) this was fine. I was perfectly okay with it because I had no desire to write. I had no ideas, no cravings, no mad obsessions. Nothing. And then I sat down and said to myself ‘Cassie, you need to write something, anything. It can be crap, but it has to be words.’

So I did. And a story came and took me by surprise. From the very first words, I knew this was something I could work with, something that I could enjoy. Have I finished writing that story? No, I have not. Because there is no time!!!! I know how it ends, I’m writing the last scene, or trying to. That said the middle scene needs expanding and I can do that easily. I love the characters, I love the world. Love it all.

Last week I didn’t care that there was no time, because I had no words. I missed them, but I wasn’t going crazy without them. Now there are words, and with words comes that frustration because there is never enough time. I could probably have several hours to myself a day and still it wouldn’t be enough.

Do you feel this too? Or is it just because the time I have is so lacking? I’d really love to know how it affects other people!

In the meantime, roll on February 1st and the return of school. At least then I have a shot of getting the two small ones to sleep and nabbing some decent writing time… Ha. Wishful thinking, I know πŸ˜‰

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11 thoughts on “Why sometimes it’s better not to want to write

  1. I don’t remember school holidays being so long – in truth, they never felt like they were long enough. It’s not just parents who can appreciate this though, as the rigors of full-time work has the same energy sapping tendencies. Not the same thing at all, but I can imagine how hard this must be for you. Ride it out for the moment, and you will hopefully get back into the routine.

    Try to think long-term. πŸ™‚

    1. I shall try πŸ˜‰ lol I can’t even imagine having a regular job these days – one day it will happen (well, hopefully not, hopefully I can make enough from my writing by the time it’s necessary to avoid going back to a regular job!).

      I don’t remember the holidays being that long either, but then, I grew up in a very different way to my eldest who has a bit of a screen addiction and doesn’t appreciate being unplugged. It’s summer tho – I refuse to have the TV on all day! It’s sad that kids don’t seem to be able to invent games like we did. I try, but she loses interest SO fast.

  2. I have a similar issue when I get really into a story. I have a 13 month old at home and can only write when he sleeps. So, there are days that I get very little writing time and I feel like I’m going to go insane if I don’t get time to write. Hopefully you will get time to write and things will get back to normal again soon. πŸ™‚

    1. Thanks! I hope so too. Totally know how you feel – baby nap times are the best. I had my two littles napping the same time during school. Everything is out of whack now though. Roll on Feb 1st!

      It does get easier as they get older πŸ™‚

  3. Sometimes, nabbing those moments and forcing yourself to write does seem to beckon the Muse. I think it’s related to the deadline-oriented journalist side of writers. I always work best under deadline–always have. I think having just a few minutes or having a deadline clarifies things for you and funnels the ideas down into something useful. I love those moments.

    I totally get what you’re saying. And it is REALLY hard to write with little ones, so go easy on yourself. Snatch those moments and use them to their fullest. πŸ™‚

    Amy

    1. Thanks, Amy! I do try too, lol I do most of my writing with a sleeping baby in arms.

      I love the pressure too tho, I thrive on a little chaos and find it spurs me on. I’m way more productive on a busy day than a do-nothing day.

  4. Oh, I remember the feeling. I imagine once Jayden comes home, then I’ll be reliving it, too πŸ™‚ I hope you get to find the time to finish your story. I guess that’s where the dedication comes in!

  5. I’ve been there. Then I felt guilty that I was being selfish. Keep a notebook with you at all times to write down any snippets that come to you. At least you won’t feel you’re losing those. And take heart, February will be here before you know it. πŸ™‚

  6. I think the more I write the more I want to write. I have no time to myself, the baby doesn’t nap any more other than 20 minutes a day in the car, and my daughter is only at preschool 9 hours a week, and between homework with my eldest, etc, writing time is something that I have scheduled with a sitter a few times a week. Knowing those are my times to write has made a huge difference in my angst when I’m not writing. And one of the things I’ve begun doing is plopping down on the floor, having the kids crawl all over me, and just plain old thinking about what I’m writing. Then I jot down the important stuff. Good luck, and I hope the shower was good πŸ™‚

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