Writers WRITE

15 Wednesday May 2013

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Last week someone pointed me to this blog post about labels – Writer vs Author. As I was reading it, I was nodding along, agreeing, until the point at which I started to feel kind of irritated. There was some uncomfortable truth in the post, and one I hadn’t been forced to think about it in a while.

A writer writes. Often. Sure they take breaks, but being a writer is a process and if you’re not involved in the process, then you can’t really call yourself a writer. There is no reason you can’t sit down and write even a hundred words a day. Hell, fifty. TWENTY. It’s still writing.

I began to justify my lack of words on page every day: But there are so many other aspects of writing that need my attention. I really need to get this outline right so that the revision can work properly. I’m world building at the moment. I have to pin down my characters; they are all over the show. I really have to get this assignment sorted. The kids need me all the time. The house needs to be cleaned. I have so many other things to do!

You get the idea…

When it comes down to it, all of those things ARE super important, both for writing, and revising in particular, and in my case, study and life in general, but they are not valid reasons for why I am not writing.

Why aren’t I writing? I have all the excuses in the world. But when it comes down to it, they are just excuses. There is no reason why I can’t find even just ten minutes a day to do the thing I love. No reason at all. I’m the only one getting in my way.

So I have picked up the pen again. Yes I have an assignment looming, and yes the pressure I feel from that is starting to build. But writing makes everything better. Knowing I am making some progress always improves my general outlook. And I have done all that restructuring and world building and planning and I’m pretty sure that this draft will kick ass. Even if I can only find 10 minutes a day to write.

I will. Because I am a writer. And writers write.

What would I do, without my to-dos?

13 Monday May 2013

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Recently a few writer friends have been on my case a bit. Between study, and the kids, I’d lost my writing drive and was fumbling around not making much progress at all. Gah. How often that seems to happen…

Anyway, back to the point of the post. Near the end of April, one friend suggested that we make weekly goals for May and see how that helps. I have long been a fan of to-do lists, so this seemed like an awesome idea to me!

That said, I had only really done lists for a day at a time, and when I made plans, there were only ever general deadlines, rather than specific dates. She whipped up a handy little sheet that we’re sharing between us, with each week having space for 7 items. I was surprised by how quickly I could break down my tasks and balance out the weeks, and even more surprised when only one day in, I had already ticked several things off! Not even two weeks in, I have ticked everything off my first two weeks, some from week three, and even a couple from week four.

I’m already thinking about what to line up for next month…

Obviously, this is going to work for me. It feels AMAZING to be making progress again and I’m really hoping that by balancing out my tasks on the list I can finally break down the mental barriers that have seen me either writing OR studying, and not both in the same day. Fingers crossed. Or not, because I can’t really get much done that way, but you get my drift.

How do you break down the mountain of tasks in your life, whether writing related or not?

Regaining Momentum

06 Monday May 2013

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Once again, it’s been a long time since I posted anything – I appear to be making a habit of this! Now it’s time to crush that habit and start forming some new ones.

Study this year has been a whole lot harder than last, and I still have many months ahead of me. However, I have made the decision not to let it kick my ass anymore, and not to let it keep getting in the way of making the writing progress I want to. I’ve been feeling really frustrated these last few months with my inability to balance my academic writing and my creative writing, but I think what I was lacking, was focus.

And now I have it. I’m not laying out all my plans here, but I DO have some, and hopefully it will be a way to keep me on track – keep writing, revising, editing. I’m currently madly in love with the series I am working on – paranormal romance set in  a small fictional NZ town – so that’s my primary focus at the moment. I’m not setting aside Sun-Touched, by any means, but I don’t have the right amount of head-space right now to rework it. As long as I have these assignments piling up, I think sticking to the more ‘fun’ easy writing is probably the best idea.

Fingers crossed it pans out! Better get back to some work hey?

How is everyone else doing? Is the year flying for you? Are you hitting your goals, or making new ones?

Regeneration – TOC

14 Sunday Apr 2013

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Random Static has released the table of contents for ‘Regeneration: New Zealand Speculative Fiction II’! So exciting!!!

From their site: 

Random Static Ltd is pleased to announce the table of contents for Regeneration: New Zealand Speculative Fiction II. Once again, we have a fantastic range of stories by talented authors, and we look forward to sharing them with you.

  • Last Harvest – Matt Cowens
  • Rescuing the Airmen – Tim Jones
  • Hunting Ythan – Mary Brock Jones
  • The Mistress of Fishes – O.J. Cade
  • Max’s Black Box – Grace Bridges
  • In a World Full of Birds – I.K. Paterson-Harkness
  • Insomnia – Kylie Thorne
  • The Spectre Spectrum – Debbie Cowens
  • Carving Out a Life – J.C. Hart
  • Kiwi or Queenie – Jennifer Compton
  • Emptying Roesler – Simon Petrie
  • Tapping the Skin of the World – Anna Smith
  • Doorway – Rebecca Harris
  • Monocarpic Colony Blues – Elizabeth Gatens
  • Harvesting the Gyre – Jonathan James Todd
  • The Origami Tree – A.J. Fitzwater
  • Evacuation – Fran Atkinson
  • Splintering – Anna Caro
  • Mother’s Milk – Dan Rabarts
  • Cave Fever – Lee Murray
  • Coat – Grant Stone
  • Ren – Toni Wi

Regeneration is due to be launched on the 12th of July at Au Contraire 2013 - watch this space for more details and pre-order information.

Yipee!! I always love seeing my name in a table of contents, but ones like these make me grin more than normal. I love knowing that I’ll be in a book with so many authors I respect and admire. I love that I will get to enjoy some NZ authors I haven’t read before. It’s totally squee-worthy, and gives me a real sense of community. I can’t wait to get my hands on a copy of this book and read what I know will be a bunch of awesome stories!

And this time around I get to be at the release!!!!! Woooo!

Anyway, I’ll let you get back to enjoying your weekend ;-) I have an essay to finish!

April begins

01 Monday Apr 2013

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The last time I blogged was an entire month ago. I don’t think I’ve ever let the blog go silent for that long, but to be honest, I just didn’t have the energy to say anything at all.

It’s been…an interesting month, I guess you would say. I started back at University and the reading workload was huge. I mean, I was swamped. I’ve finally managed to catch up, but I still don’t feel like I know enough yet. My first assignment is due in 16 days, and I am still gathering information, and wondering if I will ever get to the point where I feel caught up.

March’s main goal was to read Sun-Touched and make a revision plan for it. I read the novel! And I didn’t even cringe too much. It’s a good story but it needs plenty of work. World building is where I fall down, again, so I am doing a lot of thinking about how I can do that – not only for Sun-Touched, but also for my novella. I am planning a second in the same setting, so I really need to bring the town to life.

Between my study brain, and being faced with yet more revision, I felt a bit swamped. I didn’t write the short story that I had hoped to. I got about 1k in and canned it. Aside from that attempt I wrote nothing in March. I did play a lot of Guild Wars 2 though. I’m deep in love with it again, though am well aware that it’s escapism for me. It really helps to switch my brain off from the study stuff which seems to overtake every waking thought if I let it.

Which I guess means I am back to a place of needing to find balance. I’ve been reminded yet again that I need breaks between revision and revision (even revisions of different stories). I am sure there is a sweet spot, but I haven’t found it just yet, and the reality is that there is always going to be more revision to do than first drafting, because every story needs more than one revision. I”ll continue to mull on it anyway – maybe I need a grand story that is written just for me, and I give myself a week of free writing on it between rounds of revision? That could work. I might give it a try.

Anyway, the beginning of April sees me in a better head space. The supplements I am taking seem to be giving me the boost I needed to get out of a depressive state, and I am actually getting stuff done again which feels really good (even if none of it is writing related! lol).

I sat down this morning and said to myself – “time to quit stalling, write something”. So I am now partway through a children’s story. Totally weird that is what’s coming up, but whatever, right. Words are words! I will take them and run with the idea.

Let’s hope April is a tad more productive for me than March was! Hope you all had a lovely easter :-)

Another Month Done

01 Friday Mar 2013

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I am still getting my head around the fact that it’s March already. I always seem to forget that Feb is a short month – in any event, I managed to get through the revision of my novella, which was my primary goal. Yippee!

University has officially started for the year and I’m struggling to get my head back in the study game. The readings for the first two weeks are ridiculous (6 chapters of the text PLUS articles!) but thankfully it evens out a bit after that (1 chapter a week).

So, with that in mind, I’m taking the next week or so off from revision and am going to spend the time catching up on the other things that need my attention – I have books to read, stories to give feedback on, and study to do. My next major project is also revision (Sun-Touched, my darling, I’m finally getting back to you!) and I feel like it’s important to take a breather between projects. I’m hoping to write a new short story as well, which should be really fun.

Some of my writing buddies are reading my novella this month, so I’m feeling a little nervous and excited about hearing back from them. Feels like a while since I’ve had a critique done, but I guess you get that when you’re working on longer stories.

Right, that’s it for me for now! What have you got planned for March?

Updates!

23 Saturday Feb 2013

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I keep looking at my blog, thinking I should post something, but not really knowing where to begin. The right words have been hard to find.

So we’ll start with: I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. As you might remember, I started The Artists Way back near the start of the year. I’m actually sticking with it this time and am up to Week 7. I’m learning a lot about myself, not all of it fun, but valuable even if hard at times. It’s not resulting in massive amounts of writing, though I have been revising steadily over the month (four scenes to go!). I’m changing, I can feel that, though I don’t know what form a lot of changes will take. When I can find the words to get all my thoughts down, I will.

I’ve also accepted that I have a problem, and my moods are not normal.  I’ve been feeling all kinds of things and about 10 days ago admitted that I’m not okay. I’ve been telling people when they ask, and many are shocked (those in the face to face world, anyway, my online friends don’t get my masks so much!), though at the same time pleased that I am being honest again. It’s one of the steps towards balance for me, so I’m glad I’ve taken it. I’m also taking some vitamins and other things which seem to be helping. I’ve not been back to the pits of despair since then, which is nice. Sometimes, just admitting you aren’t okay takes the pressure off. Masks are heavy, as are fake smiles, so my advice to anyone is to cast those aside.

I also had a short story accepted for publication! Was totally surprised, but delighted of course. I can’t wait til the line-up is announce and the cover revealed, though it’s been lovely seeing other writers I know and respect mentioning on facebook and twitter that they also got in. One writer friend in particular, as it’s her first sale, and she is such an awesome writer. I am so proud of her, and so pleased we’ll get to share space inside the cover of a book.

What else? I guess life is ticking along as normal. We’re still home schooling and there are great days and not so great days. I’m enjoying getting back into some renovation stuff, ticking things off my giant list. Playcentre began last week, so we’re finding a groove with that again as well. It’s a very busy term in general. Oh, and my university paper officially begins on Monday. I’ve not had a chance to read ahead yet, but that’s okay. I feel like I can handle all the things on my plate, which is more than I was feeling a couple weeks ago.

Right, better get back to that revision huh? I hope Feb has been treating you kindly. So hard to believe it’s almost over already.

Raring to…

01 Friday Feb 2013

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Revise!

Yes, you heard me right. I am gearing up for the great novella revision, and I couldn’t be more excited!

I know. What on earth has gotten into me? I can’t really explain it. Don’t get me wrong, I do love a good bit of editing – I love cutting words, and finding ways to make things better, and cutting words, and adding more tension and all that (and cutting words – did I mention that?).

But right now, I am knee deep in the part of the process I loathe the most, and I’m more excited about it than I have ever been before. Go figure! Today I went through the novella and made scene notes, and then noted conflicts and changes, and then wrote comments on what needs improving, what needs removing, what needs moving… And came up with a pretty decent length list of things I need to do.

Strangely, this is not that different from how I normally do things. I don’t edit in order, I make lists of things to do, then usually I start with something easy (to prove that I CAN do it, and LOOK IT’S REALLY NOT SO BAD), and then I tackle something major so that I can sigh with relief and pat myself on the back for a job well done, before going back to something quick, so that I can tick something else off the list and see PROGRESS, and so on until I am sick of the sight of the thing and can’t wait to send it off to my poor crit buddies.

I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately, about other peoples editing processes, and it’s encouraged me no end to see that HEAPS of people do it this way. I thought, for awhile, that I was basically just flailing around blindly, but it turns out that folks like Chuck Wendig and Rachel Aaron have a similar process. I’ve taken some notes from both of those articles, and incorporated them into my own process to give a try this time, as always I’m ever hopeful of finding a way to make it all run a bit smoother.

I still have to write a timeline for the novella (groan…. but I know how important this is. I mean, I’m pretty sure that at one part of my novel it’s summer and then a few days later its the middle of winter), as well as get some character info solidly on the page. A few people get a bit wobbly here and there. Gotta straighten them out.

But this story is GOOD, I really believe that. Now I can’t wait to make it BETTER.

And I think, for the first time in a long time, maybe ever (definitely ever, for a story longer than a short), I’m doing all of this before I send it to so much as a single reader. I’m super pleased with myself for that. I’m going to call that growth, and a step towards not being such a lazy writer.

Go me :-)

Hope you’ve been having a good week!

Au Contraire!

29 Tuesday Jan 2013

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I’m going! Are you??

What’s Au Contraire, you ask? Au Contraire 2013: Regeneration is the 34th National Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention, and the second Au Contraire convention. It’s taking place early July in Wellington!

I have never been to a Con. It was just too hard to try and organize with small kids. But I’ve decided that they are definitely old enough this year and that if I didn’t book and start working towards making the necessary changes in order to go and feel like I wasn’t abandoning my family, I had to make the commitment NOW.

So I did it! And it felt great! Unless I manage to wrangle a trial night away from my kids before then, it will be the first time I’ve ever spent a night away from either Lauren or Natalie since their births. Yup, I am a veritable home body. There has never been a good enough reason to spend a whole night away from them. But this year I am going to be gone for three. THREE WHOLE NIGHTS and the days as well. In a totally different city.

Squeee! I’m going to a convention! I am so excited! I can’t wait to catch up with the writer friends I have met in person before, and to meet a whole bunch of people face to face for the first time. It will be so cool to finally do that. I definitely now feel like I am investing in myself, because there can be no mistaking that this weekend is for me. I’m not doing it for anyone else.

I will be there*, will you? Only another 5 months and a bit to go! And yes, I will be this excited the entire time! That’s just how I roll ;-)

*barring any sudden illnesses or disasters, of course *knocks on wood*

I’m sorry – a blanket apology

28 Monday Jan 2013

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For many months I’ve felt a niggling sense of frustration, and it’s taken me this long to really come to the point where I can simply say “I stuffed up”. I say it quite honestly, with feeling, because I did stuff up. I have lost track of how many people I have let down, and so I just wanted to take a moment to apologise.

I take too many things on-board. I have a hard time saying no. I genuinely want to do everything I say yes to, but the reality is that things have been slipping through the cracks. Chunks of time get lost. Whole items on my mental to-do list disappear. If you’ve asked me to do something, read something, crit something, comment on something, write a review, and I never got back to you – I’m sorry. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to, it’s because life has crushed me this last year and I just couldn’t. I can’t keep on top of everything.

Some of you will remember that at the beginning of last year I stepped aside from a number of responsibilities – I became a regular member of Kiwi Writers instead of staff, I quit my proof reading job, I even stopped training to become a Lifeline Counsellor – because I simply could not keep up. Later in 2012 I declined a nomination for Secretary of SpecFicNZ as I’d held the position for a while but felt someone else could do a better job of it.

Yet here I am again, a whole year on, and I’m still feeling overwhelmed.

I’m really hopeful that THIS year I will be able to get on top of things. I have to get better at saying no. I have to find a way to carve out (and maintain) some solid blocks of time for myself (because, you know, I have value too. I’m finally getting to the point where I can say I’m also important). But it’s just so hard to say no! You all have such interesting books and stories and I want to see what you’re up to. I want to read that thing you had published. I want to write a review and tell people how great it is. There just isn’t enough time for everything though, and I have to make my own words a priority. I know well and truly that while it *seems* easier to work on everyone else’s novels, the thing that really feeds me is to work on mine.

Even if it’s harder, and makes me want to scream more often.

So, I am sorry. Sorry I didn’t email you back. Sorry I didn’t crit that thing in time. Sorry if when I did send comments they weren’t really what you were looking for, didn’t have enough information, entirely missed the point. I’m sorry if I stopped commenting so much on your blog. I’m sorry if I read your book, told you I’d review it and then it took me months to get around to following through. None of it was intentional.

Going forward, I am going to try to stop and think more carefully before I say yes. I’m going to figure out if I can genuinely find the time for it, and then I am going to base my decision on that. If I say no, it’s not because I don’t value you – I do. It’s simply because I genuinely just can’t commit and I don’t want to let you down.

I hate letting people down, it makes me feel icky inside. I don’t like feeling icky.

Right, feels good to get that off my chest. I hope you’ll forgive me.

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